Nanny Giuliani (AKA Julie Nanny)
Rudy wants to be your nanny and tell you what to do. He hates your freedoms.
He’ll slam the cookie jar on your hand.
He’ll put your ferret to sleep and cook it for dinner.
He’ll spank you* when you don’t finish your ferret.
He’ll force you to sleep at 9:11 every night.
He’ll scare you with WTC stories so you won’t leave your room.
(And there’s a terrorist in your closet).
He makes your friends take off their shoes at home to check for shoe-bombs.
He beats you* and tortures when your RFID chip is not functional**
He dresses and speaks like Mrs. Doubtfire when he invites Trump over.
He warns you there will be another 9/11 if you are not good.
He won’t shut up about 9/11 even for the 9 minutes and 11 seconds you are allowed to watch TV***
He’ll punish you* for writing in Arabic numerals.
He once locked your friend Gibran in your ferret cage and threatened to waterboard him until he admitted he hated your freedoms.
*With a mangled 9/11 beam.
**Because you might not be you.
***You are only allowed to watch FOX news; and commercials count.
References:
Right-wing Authoritarianism
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Right-wing_Authoritarianism
Anti-social personality disorder
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antisocial
Authoritarianism
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Authoritarianism
June 30th, 2007
Posted by
eaglescout |
Satire, 2008 Election, Neoconservatives, Terrorism |
one comment
It’s a neoconservative think tank.
Wikipedia
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_for_the_New_American_Century
Official Statement of Principles
http://www.newamericancentury.org/statementofprinciples.htm
PNAC Associations with Bush administration:
Dick Cheney,
Donald Rumsfeld,
John Bolton,
Paul Wolfowitz
Richard Armitage,
Scooter Libby… etc…
These are the people that want to nation-build, protect Israel at all costs and kill Arabs for oil and any “U.S. interest”.
June 28th, 2007
Posted by
VoiceOfReason |
Truth |
no comments
I know! Let’s piss off more innocent civilians so that they teach their children to hate the United States. Then they can aspire to be like Osama Bin Laden, Saddam Hussein and Ahmadinejad to avenge their dead little brothers and sisters.
Then when the government stabilizes, and someone questionable arises to power, we can arrange a coup d’etat. When the coup d’etat fails, and our spies and special forces are captured we can claim they have taken our “civilians” hostage without justification.
After imposing sanctions and destroying a poor nation economically, and when our spies are returned, we can send weapons of mass destructions to neighboring allies, say like Israel (hypothetical… it’s not like we’d ever let a country intimidate another with nuclear weapons or anything).
After 50 years of no diplomatic relations, and when some natural disaster like an earthquake hits California, we can say this rogue nation detonated a nuclear weapon into the earth’s core to set off the San Andreas fault as a terrorist attack.
We’ll cry and cry about how the world has changed, because never before has a nuclear weapon been used in this destructive way before. And we’ll launch a preemptive strike against this rogue nation. When it turns out this country has no weapons at all (not even sling-shots) we’ll change our story and say we were there to overthrow a nasty dictatorship and bring democracy. We’ll find the nasty dictator throwing darts at a globe in his presidential suite and claim he was found in underground caves plotting the destruction of the United States with intercontinental ballistic missile prototypes.
Then, when civilians think we have overstayed our visa and they start killing our soldiers, we can call them “terrorists” (It’s a new word I invented - it means anything that moves).
Anyway… I don’t know what to do after that… but I do know we must win. Because not winning means failure. And it also means defeat. We cannot accept defeat. Because we must finish the job. If we don’t finish the job, we can’t win. It’s that simple. We can’t let terrorists win. Because then we’d lose.
And nobody wants to lose. Because, losing, is not winning, at all.
June 7th, 2007
Posted by
eaglescout |
Strategy, Technology, Terrorism, Truth |
one comment
This is an ingenious plan to get Ron Paul elected.
“This is my plan to help Ron Paul take the primaries. This is something all Ron Paul supporters need to unite behind. If he doesn’t win the primaries, it’s game over.”
read more | digg story
June 6th, 2007
Posted by
VoiceOfReason |
2008 Election, Strategy, Truth |
no comments
The media tries to be objective, right?
You are in for a surprise you might just enjoy!
Watch the following (brief and interesting):
A Fox, a Wolf, and a lot of Bull.
A Fox, a Wolf, and a lot of Bull - Part 2.
For more neutral reporting watch The Daily Show tonight @ 11 and the Colbert Report next week (Wednesday, June 13th) Ron Paul will be a special guest, courtesy of Digg.com.
June 4th, 2007
Posted by
VoiceOfReason |
Strategy, 2008 Election, No Spin At All, Cute, Evil Elements, Iraq War, Terrorism, Al-Qaeda, Truth |
one comment
Select as many as apply:
I want a president with a low IQ (I’m voting for Giuliani)
I support a police state (Giuliani)
I want a candidate who worships Bush, the worst ex-president ever (Giuliani)
I will vote for a woman even if she doesn’t stand for anything just because we can’t let countries like Indonesia be the only ones which have had a female president. (Clinton)
I only vote for candidates with disfigured faces or heavy plastic surgery. (McCain, Clinton).
I support polygamy (Giuliani) and will never vote for Paul or Romney.
I hate ferrets (Giuliani)
I want to outlaw jaywalking and torture jaywalkers in this country (Giuliani)
I want to outlaw videogames, especially if they are violent (Clinton).
I have no understanding of right and wrong (Giuliani, Romney, Tancredo).
I like killing innocent civilians and interfering wth other countries (Bush [write-in])
I support terrorism (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], Romney).
I am an ignorant bastard (Tancredo, Giuliani)
I just want a black president, even if he is not 51% black (Obama).
I don’t want to know what my candidate stands for until after the elections (Clinton, Obama).
I hate my country and want it destroyed by the hatred of our old allies (Bush [write-in], Giuliani, Bolton [write-in])
I like Osama Bin Laden. It makes for entertaining news! (Bush [write-in], Giuliani)
We can’t forget 9/11, 9-11, 9.11, September 11, nine-eleven, … (Giuliani)
I want all internet communications controlled by the government, and I don’t mind being labelled a terrorist (Gingrich).
My ideal government is a police state (Giuliani, Gingrich)
Terror alerts give me an adrenaline rush (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], Gingrich).
I am a terrorist (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], Gingrich]
I am Osama Bin Laden (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], Gingrich)
I enjoy self-inflicted wounds (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], Gingrich)
I support the Daily Show and the Colbert Report, and they need material (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], Clinton, Tancredo, Al Gore [write-in], Bolton [write-in]).
I love fear-mongers (Bush [write-in], Giuliani, Al Gore).
We must win the war on FIRE!
I hide behind patriotism (Giuliani, Bush [write-in], McCain)
I want an illiterate idiot for president (Giuliani, Bush [write-in])
We can accelerate the arrival of the second-coming! (Bush [write-in], Giuiliani])
I love the idea of a new draft, especially with all the explosive new developments! (Edwards)
I’m too lazy to learn Spanish or get a job (Tancredo)
I want a W clone who can pretend - through acting - he isn’t one (Thompson)
Also because:
Ron Paul, like our founding fathers, is an extremist.
After 8 years of experience, Bush might make a good president, yet!
I’d like to use the constitution as toilet paper, given the chance.
June 2nd, 2007
Posted by
eaglescout |
Satire, 2008 Election, War on Fire, Terrorism, Iraq War |
11 comments